January 16, 2013

Thoughts From A Mother...

Our daughter is 20 months old and we are weaning her off of the pacifier; it’s been a difficult few weeks. One night was especially rough and she had been crying for over an hour with no consolation. I was getting so frustrated, trying to explain to her that she is getting older and it’s time to let go of the pacifier. She’s getting teeth that we need to protect and we want to keep her from getting infections. Explaining that to a toddler is impossible. They just know that they want something and you’re not giving in.
I really felt the LORD saying to me “Jess, this is how I feel about you sometimes. I know what is best for you. I have a plan for you. But you don’t see that. You just want what you want; you have to trust me and let go.” There are many things in our lives that we really want and we beg and plead with GOD for. It can be a new job or a new house, maybe a relationship that we want to hold onto or it could be a habit or almost anything, really, that we just have to have. We don’t understand why a GOD that is so wonderful and loves us so much would ever tell us “No”. Why would HE deny us???
As parents, we often get pushed to the edge and finally give up: giving the toy or the pacifier and say “Here! Here’s the toy or the pacifier or whatever you want. Now just be quiet!” But what does that teach them? How does that help them learn? How does that benefit us in any way? GOD loves us so much and wants to bless us. HE wants to teach us patience and faith and if HE always gave us everything we wanted, would we really need HIM anymore? 
GOD loves us, HE wants to bless us. Just like we love our children and want to bless them and make them happy and see them laugh and smile. GOD wants to give us the desires of our hearts but often the timing is just off. We never know if we are meant to be in a specific job for some reason, or maybe the car that we want so badly is actually a lemon that will cause us more grief in the end. Or maybe that relationship will end up leading us away from GOD. We don’t always see the whole picture and that’s why we MUST trust HIM. Maybe HE is not going to heal our friend who was battling cancer so bravely. Maybe HE planned to take her home to finally end her pain and maybe her nurses will come to know Christ through this. We don’t know why HE may not be answering right away but if we just stop crying and listen for a moment, maybe we’ll hear HIM. 
So that night, after fighting endlessly and trying to explain repeatedly that she would not get her “paci” I finally changed my approach and told her that I loved her so much and asked her to trust me. I asked her to let me help her become a big girl and just kept saying that I loved her, over and over. Within a few minutes she was asleep. If we can stop our fussing and stop our crying long enough to listen, maybe we’ll get a glimpse of the big picture. Maybe we can trust HIM enough and we'll finally see all that HE has for us and how wonderfully HE really does love us.

1 comment:

  1. What an incredible post, thank you for taking the time to share. I love it when God shows up in the "ordinary" things of life.

    My husband and I are in the process of purchasing our first house and let me tell you, I can definitely identify with what you shared in your post. It's been an awful and wonderful process.

    I love learning how to trust God in a whole new way - if He intends for this house to become our Home, I would be so incredibly happy and feel so blessed. And yet if He says no and it doesn't work out, I know in my heart that it's because He has something better planned for us.

    Keep in mind that I cannot fathom anything more perfect than this house as our first home together, and yet who am I to pretend that I know more than God?!

    I do NOT want to be like the Israelites who refused to take no for an answer. In 1 Sam 8 they demanded that God provide them with a King, even though God warned them that if they refused to listen to God and refused to believe that He knew was was BEST for them, they would have a King that would take and take and take from them and eventually make slaves of them.

    The Israelites refused to listen and threw temper-tantrums and demanded that God give them a King.

    And so they got Saul. At first it seemed great, but we all know how that worked out for them in the long run. (summary...not well....)

    Oh God, do not let me grow so stubborn that I refuse to listen to You! Do not let me believe that I know better than You! Give me grace to acknowledge Your goodness even when I don't feel like it. You are good, and that's all this heart needs to dwell on.

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